|
This month, I want to do something a little different—I want to talk about me for a change.
Now, before you think, “Why is she turning the spotlight on herself?”—stay with me. I promise this isn't about self-promotion or self-indulgence. There’s a real lesson in here for you, too. Something I’ve come to realize in my journey as a leadership coach that I think you might need to hear.
As many of you know, I’ve been doing this work for a long time—coaching, mentoring, leading. But in the past several months, something has shifted. I’ve taken my practice full-time. I’ve made it my business. And as a result, I’ve been working with more clients, more consistently, and more deeply than ever before.
And let me tell you—something magical happens when you commit to doing this kind of work on a deeper level.
The Gift of Deep Listening
One of the biggest gifts of being a leadership coach is that I get to listen—really, really listen. Not the listening where you're nodding while thinking of your to-do list or waiting to jump in with your own story. I'm talking about listening with your whole being, with no agenda other than to understand.
When I sit across from a client—virtually or in person—I get to hear their raw, unfiltered thoughts. And here’s the thing: what people say out loud, often for the first time, is incredibly powerful. There’s a vulnerability in it. A truth. And that’s where the transformation begins.
But here’s what I didn’t expect: how often I would hear the same voice. Not the literal same voice, of course—but the same internal narrative. The one that whispers things like:
- “I’m not ready.”
- “Who do I think I am?”
- “I’ll do it later—when things calm down.”
- “I’m not good enough.”
Sound familiar?
The Real Roadblock: Ourselves
Here’s my realization: the biggest roadblock we all face isn’t a lack of skills, or resources, or time. It’s our inner voice.
That sneaky little voice that lives in all of us—the voice of self-doubt, fear, perfectionism, or just plain exhaustion. And the more I coach, the more I see the pattern: most people don’t even realize how much they’re sabotaging themselves.
They’re so used to their own narrative that it doesn’t even register as sabotage. It feels like logic. It feels like “just being realistic.” It feels like “playing it safe.”
But from my seat as a coach? I can see it clearly: It’s self-sabotage. It’s fear dressed up in grown-up clothes. And it’s holding so many of us back.
Guilty as Charged
And here’s the part I want to be honest about: I do it too.
Yep. Guilty as charged.
You might think, “Wait, Simona, you? But this is your job!” And yes—it is. I help people overcome their self-limiting beliefs and step into their full leadership potential. But just because I coach others through this doesn't mean I’m immune.
If anything, listening to my clients has helped me recognize my patterns even more clearly. I started noticing all the excuses I’d been telling myself. All the little “yeah, but...” moments. All the ways I’ve talked myself out of taking risks, showing up fully, or owning my power.
And let me tell you—admitting that? That takes some serious self-honesty. But I’m sharing it with you because I believe in authenticity. I can’t ask my clients to be brave and vulnerable if I’m not willing to do the same.
You Are Not Alone
I hope that by sharing this, I make you feel a little less alone.
Because here's what I want you to know: yes, self-sabotage is common. More common than you think. And no, that doesn't mean it’s okay to let it run the show—but it does mean you’re not broken, or lazy, or weird.
You’re human.
Even high achievers—especially high achievers—struggle with this. And when you start to recognize your own patterns, you can start to shift them.
That’s the work I get to do with my clients every day. Helping them catch that inner voice. Question it. Replace it. And move forward anyway.
So... What About You?
If you’re reading this and nodding along, maybe it’s time to ask yourself:
- What are you self-sabotaging around right now?
- Where are you holding yourself back with your own narrative?
- What dream, goal, or change is sitting on the shelf—not because you can’t do it, but because you’re convincing yourself you shouldn’t? The first step isn’t to make a big leap.
The first step is to notice. Listen to how you talk to yourself. Pay attention to when you delay, deflect, or downplay.
And then… ask yourself: What would happen if I didn’t believe that thought?
Final Thoughts
Being a leadership coach is the greatest privilege of my career, not because I get to give advice but because I get to witness people shift. I get to hear the moment their inner voice softens. I get to see them realize, often for the first time, that they are not their fear. That their doubts are not facts. That their future doesn’t have to look like their past.
And honestly? Getting to have that experience for myself, too, is a gift I’ll never stop being grateful for.
Are you ready to face your inner voice? Reach out to me so we can talk!
|
