During a recent podcast interview I recorded for one of Italy's leading coaching programs, I had the opportunity to discuss a concept I explore deeply in my recent book, Authentically Yours: "Courage is a muscle."
In the book, I write: "Courage is knowing all the fear and difficulties you may face, but realizing that the battle is worth the fight. Still, it doesn't come naturally to most, courage has to be built."
During the interview, I was asked: "What is the most uncomfortable, but transformative, exercise someone can do to train the courage muscle?"
My answer came without hesitation: "Take inventory."
In cost engineering, inventory feels natural. We quantify, we estimate, we measure progress against plan. We always know exactly where we started, where we are going with a project, and where we are as we develop it.
But outside our projects and spreadsheets, inventory becomes much harder. Because in life, sometimes the hardest thing is admitting where we really are.
I once worked with a client who was struggling with personal finances, not because she lacked discipline or capability, but because sitting down to review her bank account felt emotionally heavy. She feared what she might find. She worried she was "behind." And with that came guilt, shame, and avoidance.
I saw the same dynamic with another client, a student preparing for a major exam. He was overwhelmed by the amount of studying ahead of him. So overwhelmed, in fact, that he avoided calculating how much material remained.
He didn't want to count the pages. Not because pages are a perfect measure of effort, they aren't. Anyone who has studied knows ten pages can feel easy or impossible depending on the material. But page count still offers something valuable: a reference point. A starting point. An indication of the distance between where we are and where we want to go. He was so afraid of failing that hiding felt safer than taking a chance on himself. But without that inventory, the task felt infinite. Once he counted it, it became difficult, but defined. And defined is easier to face than undefined. We worked together on creating a plan, and not only did he pass the exam, but he passed with flying colors.
This is why, as a coach, I pay close attention to the areas my clients struggle to describe clearly. Often, those are the places where fear is strongest and where self-sabotage quietly hides.
As engineers, we have an advantage. We know very well that we cannot improve what we cannot measure. Looking at data comes naturally to us. And yet, even with all our technical expertise, we often struggle to apply that same objectivity to ourselves. Because when we start judging ourselves, data stops feeling neutral.
Which is why it's important to remember: Taking inventory does not mean judging.
We are all a work in progress, and it is important to remember that no matter where we start, we can improve ourselves. We can change our behaviors and become the best version of ourselves.
Clients have sometimes initially felt bad when they finally took inventory. And you know what? There have been moments in my life when I felt bad myself. But let's not forget that it is just a frame; it is not the whole movie. Where we are today can be very different from where we'll be tomorrow. But to move forward, we need to know where we're starting from. Like entering a destination into a GPS, you can't find the route unless you first identify your location. And at times it might get messy, and there could be roadworks and lane closures that could make us detour, but we will get where we want to go if we set out intentions with clarity.
Where are you avoiding inventory? A powerful question for any of us, especially those of us trained to think analytically, is this: What area of my life or work feels hardest to look at and measure right now?
It might be scary at first to admit where you are, and the distance to your destination could feel daunting, but this is a necessary step to start moving. But I can promise you, because I have seen it happening over and over, that once the initial moment has passed, once you have taken inventory, you'll feel better soon after.
The act of measuring doesn't eliminate fear, but it often shrinks it enough so that we can move. That movement gives you energy; you finally feel "unstuck" and start making progress. Progress comes with hope that keeps you driving forward.
So perhaps the invitation is this: Take inventory. Especially where you least want to. Especially where you've been avoiding the numbers and where it feels uncomfortable.
Sometimes the place we resist measuring most is the place that holds the clearest roadmap for what comes next. This is often where coaching becomes so powerful because sometimes the hardest inventory to take is the one we attempt alone.
When we are too close to a problem, our fears can cloud our perspective. We avoid the numbers, delay the difficult conversations, and create stories that feel more comfortable than the truth. Not because we are unwilling to face reality, but because it can be hard to see clearly when we are standing in the middle of our own experience.
A coach helps you find clarity by gently guiding you back to the places you may have stopped paying attention to. They ask the questions you've been avoiding and reflect things with honesty, curiosity, and no judgment. Sometimes what we need most is not a new strategy. It is a safe space to see reality more clearly, so we can finally decide what to do next.
So, if there is an area of your work or life where taking inventory feels unusually difficult, pay attention to that. That resistance may be pointing you toward something important. If looking there feels difficult, you don't have to do it alone. Sometimes the clearest path forward begins with someone sitting beside you while you take that first honest look.
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Simona Pappalardo is a successful executive and leadership coach. Before starting her own business, she held several executive roles within the semiconductor, electronics, and manufacturing industries, in Quality, Product Development, and Supply Chain Operations. You can follow Simona on her YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/@CoachingwithSimona and reach out to her directly at [email protected]
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